Really not sure what to post right now. I feel so random at the moment and so confused in life. I don't know exactly what I want or what I am looking for. I feel my mood has lightened up a bit today cause I woke up this morning feeling quite happy. I still told myself not to keep my hopes up and it is a good choice goes at this point I dragged my hopes down and nothing disappointing as happened so far.
A few friends sort of got on my nervous in the morning during one of our classes but I guess at the point I started to go through a rough moody patch. Not sure if they noticed but oh well all is good. Right now I feel quite happy mainly cause I just resting a bit and started watching a 3 mins clip of BTS showcasing a song. AHHH~~~ Jimin too me is very very cute (^.^). Just fan-girling over them.
Anyway, today I had a chance to actually see Ling if I waited for the next train cause I finished early today. I thought to myself if I should wait around kind of dawdle to the train station so I can bump into him, but then I thought nah he is with his friends and I am with no one. I feel like if we did it would be awkward knowing that he doesn't really want me to see his friends in the first place.
Even though I really wanted to see him again, I thought that I should just go home early do my work and let him catch the train with his friends. So the first train that came by I jumped on and went straight home. Some part of me wished that he was fast and was at the train station before the train came and I did so some people from his school. I knew though that it wouldn't happen and so I just let it be.
I don't know anymore. I probably can see him tomorrow if I wonder near the train station with D.H. . . Oh well we will see. Point is I think I am feeling happier especially when I read my one of my friends blog and remembered how I made her very happy that day before. I am glad that I can make my friends happy cause that means I am doing a good job as a friend. When ever my friends need a shoulder to lean on I will be there cause I feel like that is what I should do. I will do it for my bf too. I will always aim to make the people I love and care about happy cause if they are happy it would usually mean I am happy.
I do hope Ling is happy and I hope he misses me cause I do miss him but for some reason I have an unease feeling. Probably just me thinking too much. Alright I will stop thinking about it and I will do more study.
Don't worry friends. I am improving my mood bit by bit just you wait I shall be a happy little girl very soon. (hopefully).
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