Hang the Bird

Today, I saw something both very cruel and upsetting yet something very nice happened as a result. I was going for lunch with W.Z and Ling during a library study and Ling had noticed something across the street. There were people staring at something and he wanted to know what he was staring at. We later found out that there was this bird that was hanged up on a tree and was still alive. I think it was choking and I was horrified as in what kind of evil person would hang a bird on a tree and leave it to die.

Ling had said maybe it got caught be itself and I thought yeah maybe that is the case but still I really wanted to save it but I didn't know how to get up there. Later I saw someone climb our to save the bird it was so high and he could have fallen and all that for the bird. I thought was very sweet.

I noticed the bird trying to get away from the people once it was taken down from the tree however it couldn't go anywhere cause of the string around it. W.Z had told me that the bird couldn't get away was cause it feet was also bound together which therefore means someone was hanging the bird. This goes back to my original point on how can someone just do it how thoughtless and ahhh~ animal cruelty written all over it. I hate it. I am so glad though that the bird was saved and taken care of now hopefully.

We went back to the lib later and into a room we booked however we didn't study much cause in the end we played truth and dare. One dare that worried me a lot was the prank call I need to do towards my friend beautiful. I had to lie that I saw Ling with another girl and I did but after we told her it was a dare she seemed pretty pissed and I apologised non-stop though I think I started to piss her off more with the non-stop apologising :P

Beautiful though trusted Ling very much and believed that he didn't cheat. There might be another explanation and I believe the way she think is right cause I don't believe Ling would cheat but by saying that I would never know if he did cause he would probably hide it very well.

Towards the end of the day, I felt very depressed. I had so much going on in my head and I guess it was. . . I don't know what to say. . . Sigh, I wanna talk to someone about it but. . . I guess. . . AHHH~ I don't know. To be honest, I had tears in my eyes on the train while I was lying on Ling. He didn't notice anything nor did he notice that the entire time I was faking my happiness and smile. He seemed to really believe that I was happy when in actual fact I was trying hide it and keep my thoughts to myself.

Alright, I can't do this no more. Gonna go study.

Productive Study?

Haha, alright today was meant to be a bio study day 

but it happened to be just one big procrastination. 

In the morning I came and I did a bit of bio study 

until about 11:00 something when everyone wanted to go have lunch. 

I meet a few of Ling's friends and went for lunch with them and M.V. 

After lunch at the sushi train place, 

we went back to the lib where we ended up procrastinating playing truth and dare. 

The dares was just. . . 

I don't know how to describe it 

but so different to how I would have played it normally with my friends. 

But in a way it was pretty fun. 

There was also just one guy there cause Ling and had leave halfway through 

and he had to participate in most of the dares. 

Sigh~ I didn't get much work done but I did have fun. 

8001 Pageviews

I have about 8001 pageviews not including the views I get from this blog. 

8001~ 

Hehe, not a lot compared the very popular blogs,

but for me it is pretty big. 

Never thought my blog would have so many views. 

This is about my 452 blog post and 

it has been about 1 year and 5 months since I started this blog. 

I can't believe, I am still blogging cause I normally would get bored already.

But I guess this is sort of like a journal to me and 

also I am interested in how many people actually look at my blog. 

So it is pretty cool. 

Though the next few weeks I believe I would blog less. 

HSC is coming up and I need to focus more. 

1 month from now I would be free from the HSC.

1 month from now I would come home for my last exam and just sleep. 

1 month from now I would be counting down till midnight so I would finally be an adult. 

1 month from now, I am finished 13 years of schooling. 

Ahhh~~~ So fast time flies. 

>.<

Random Depressing Thoughts

For some reason at dinner I felt this very uncomfortable feeling and it sort of like something heavy is on your chest. It is a very pleasant feeling. All of a sudden I was reminded of a creative writing piece I have written and it was a part of my memory. A memory that hurts me every time and then a line of flash backs of the worst moments in my life just comes flooding back.

These memory's made me really want to cry cause at the time there was so much sadness and pain that I really didn't wanna feel. A lot of these memories, I could never blog about because it is very personal and if I did blog about it people could report it. But all the details and pain only one of my friends knows almost every single detail of it. She is a very trusted friend and we can relate and support each other.

Our family situations in the past are very similar though at times I feel like hers may have been worst than mine. But I really trust her and she out of everyone I know understands my situation and supports me and keeps me going. Other than my friend, I know a person lived throughout it longer than I have and was caught up in the middle of all these past memories while all I was was just a mere witness.

She has so much hate and anger built up inside her. She is so strong and determine in everything she does. I who have been brought up in the chaos was the weaker one, the one people thought was too innocent and naive. I really admire her. She lived through the pain and yet still stands up tall. She moves on with her life and let the memories effect her. Even though the hate and anger from the past would always remain she would never let it take over her normal life. She has escape the past and into her own future while I still stuck in chaos. I really admire her and I wish I was more like her but I know I am completely the opposite.

I know I didn't give specific names to those people who I was talking about, but if you have read my blog long enough or know me personally you would know that the friend I was talking was referring to beautiful and the girl I admire is my sister. The chaos and memories the hurt me is all due to family reasons.

Some memories make you smile and others just makes you wanna cry. Yet memories would stay with you forever no matter if they are good or bad. It is hard to forget the memories that made you so happy and those that made you hurt but the memories that are the most clear are the ones that hurt.

Sigh~ I don't know what I am blogging about I am sort caught up with thinking back on the things I wanna forget that I just forgot everything. Oh well, no time to think about it now. I better get some work done or at least correct this negativity of mine. Back to happy memories.

Restricted

I hate the restrictions I have at home. 

I see how everyone parents seem so relaxed in how late that allow their child to stay out 

and yet now my dad has told me I have to be home by 6. 

I don't like it. 

I don't like being stuck at home and 

if I had a choice I rather stay in the library till it closes, 

honestly I wanna be out and not be caged at home.

In fact, today close to the end I was sort of quiet and depressed 

cause I knew I had to be home soon and I didn't wanna go home. 

I really just wanna stay in the lib; 

stay with my friends to study and enjoy their company. 

I wish I could rebel against what my dad says and not go home so early. 

But I admit I am scared of him and would not go against his words that often. 

Ahhh~~~ Why can't they give me the freedom to do what I want?

They even want to live with me in the future as in sell the house and buy a new one. 

Honestly, NO I don't want to cause even though they say that they won't care about what I do. 

I know for a fact that they would care and bug me. 

I just need the freedom, the choice to do things on my own. 

They been protecting me since I was young. 

I feel so spoilt by them and it seems like I can't do anything myself. 

No, I must find an escape. 

I need to, I just need to live on my own until I actually settle down with a family. 

When I do settle down and want to start a family then I wouldn't mind living with my parents. 

BUT NOW, I want my freedom and the ability to live on my own. 

I need to get away from them. 

I just realised how cling my parents are to me. 

I want to get away from them for a while.

It isn't like I don't love them or something.

But I just need a break from their protection. 

Sounds like a module in english

but, I need to break the barrier and safety of the home environment. 

I need to move into the world and experience things on my own 

Study Fun

Yesterday, I had meet up with Ling in the early morning before meeting Beautiful at the Lib later that day. I meet Ling around about 9-10 in the morning at strathfield where we wonder around a bit before getting to burwood to have lunch at a sushi train place which was expensive as most sushi train restaurants are.

After lunch we waited at the lib for Beautiful and we study for about 4 hrs before Ling had to go for a dentist appointment. After his dentist appointment we made our way to strathfield by train where Beautiful had asked Ling if he minded public affection. He didn't really understand it that much cause he thought it was like public confession at first and he screamed out "Dora, I Love You " I started blushing and hid away a bit cause I didn't know how to really react at that exact moment. Yes, I was happy. Throughout the day, Beautiful had started daring Ling to do more intimate stuff and Ling did the dares.

After getting to strathfield, we went to 2 karaoke places and sang a lot of random songs though I didn't sing as much or at all in the second one we went to. It was actually more expensive at the first one. I had lots of fun with Beautiful and Ling. I felt happy to have hang out just the 3 of us again before the cruel fate of HSC begins.

Once karaoke was complete, we had dinner at Bangkok Snap which by far is the best Thai food place I have eaten so far. We enjoy a lovely dinner and coincidently we saw a girl from my high school who Ling and I met a week before. Ling and I waited with Beautiful for her dad to pick her up and later my mum decided to pick me up cause they thought I was going home to late. The waiting trip was fun as we talk a lot about things which I don't remember though Beautiful did dare Ling to kiss me again.

Sigh, thinking back makes me happy but one thing that annoyed me was about having to go home after such a wonderful day. Other than that I had a very fun day and probably the last fun day before HSC starts. >.< Ahh I am scared for the HSC.

Questions

I was alone today after tutorials and I did some study in library, didn't have much to eat but thats ok I wasn't hungry. I just asked myself a lot of question sort of question you won't expect to find answers to. I don't I feel lost with myself again, not sure about a lot of things. 

You know, I am happy for Y.L and her BF they are really cute together and you can see how happy Y.L has become. There is such a cute intimate stage sort of reminds of the time I started with Ling. However her one last so much more longer than mine ever did which is a good sign I believe, he could just be the one for Y.L. 

A part of me seems to be a bit jealous even though at times, I do experience those mushy times and all but then I have those times that I am so worried and nervous that I feel sick. Sigh, I really wonder to myself how long Ling will stay interested in me and I know I shouldn't be think about it and just enjoy the moment but I can't help be wonder. 

I was questioning myself with all these questions like who would I end up with? Who would I marry in the future? What kind of life would I have? and all those future thinking questions that you know you won't get an answer from, only time would tell.

I am confused at where I stand really. I have only told one person this but apparently Ling likes submissive girls and I am basically very submissive. I don't like being submissive but then at times I do as well. It is hard to explain. I am just a little lost in my own thoughts. Maybe none of this makes sense. . . 

What am I even talking about? I don't know. So much thoughts going around in my head and maybe I am just feeling the stress and pressure of the HSC. Recently I really just wanna sleep and don't eat as much as I do. I mean still eat but it seems a bit out of balance in a way that sometimes I can eat a lot and the next I don't feel like eating anything. 

I don't know. . . I am just confused, confused, confused >~<

The Feeling of Home

"The feeling of home for me is

Safe, warm and cozy

But the feeling of home for someone else is

Danger, cold and discomfort

. . .

The feeling of home for me is like

Heaven inhabited by angels

But the feeling of home for someone else is

A house of dilemmas with devil-like humans inside

A home is a place that is a privilege to live in

As many of us don’t have one"

I feel like the someone else this poem is talking about. Home for me feels dangerous and feels like a monster is outside just waiting to attack and will attack at an minute. That is not how a home isn't meant to feel like and yet it feels that way. Especially now. . . Sigh when can I have that dream home of mine.

If you wanna see the entire poem click the link at the bottom. I only pasted the ones that I believe suited me.
http://meaningofhome.ca/entry/the-feeling-of-home/#sthash.u9hWgzwO.dpuf

Be Strong. . . FAILED

Alright so for some strange reason my dad was SUPER angry today and 

because he heard my mum is sending my sister to the airport. 

I don't understand, why he is so pissed. 

But I told myself, be strong don't care what is happening. 

Doesn't affect you and all.

I was strong. 

I kept myself distracted and I had Ling, 

he had me distracted with his happiness. . . 

It only lasted so long. 

At one point I heard my dad next bashing something 

which I expect to be my mum's laptop.  

I rushed out cause I need to defend my mum that is what I thought.

I walk out of my room and was what is happening. 

My dad yelled at me not to make him angry and 

I put my hands up trying stay say and keep him from yelling at me. 

Once he left I went for my mum check if she is ok.

Later I went back into my room and resumed my distraction mood. 

Didn't last long. 

More yelling came from outside. . . 

A lot more non-stop, threats and everything. 

I got scared. 

I broke down after trying so hard not to.

Tears form in my eyes I held it in as long as I could, 

trying not to let Ling notice (which he apparently noticed). 

Yes I cried. 

I was scared. 

I stay in my room and I didn't know what was happening outside. 

There is things that might have happened and I don't wanna mention it here.

I failed at being strong. 

I let it get to me and cried though part of me is glad Ling was there to lift me up 

but then I wanna just cry as well but I couldn't.
I had to be strong.

Gosh it was just too much. 

I don't know how to go on.  

I gonna go back to distraction mood. 

I wanna go into happy land.

Random Dream

I had a dream last night it wasn't scary or anything but I was woken up suddenly. 

It was sort of like those kind of short dreams when you are falling and you suddenly wake up. 

So the dream. . . was really random.

I can barely remember most of it but I remember. . .

AHH~~~ I remember walking Lady (I did that today 0.0)

Yeah but then there was this big orange like wolf much bigger than lady.

It was eating something and Lady seem to want it but couldn't get it. 

The wolf wasn't happy and wanted chase us and eat us 

but there was a fence between me and him. 

Lady on the other hand was easy to reach and I

 was calling her to come back or go around the fence. 

That was one scene I remember. 

Another one was where I was in hiding with a few people and it was like a garage area. 

There was these weird magical monsters that had powers and 

each person was supposedly meant to work with one. 

One (from memory) looked like a large banana with many faces on it.

There was a flowered one and a weird white monster with 2 long legs.

It was very strange. . . 

Anyway the last scene I remember was the one I suddenly awaken from. 

I remember that I was looking in a mirror and fixing my hair. 

In fact through out the whole dream I remember doing that constantly. 

I remember every time I did, it looked like I was losing a bit of hair. 

To the end I realised my top part was almost bold and I freaked out. 

When I looked in the sink there was these sort bug looking things.

I was so disgusted by it and I realised it wasn't just one bug but like 5 or 6. 

The minute I realised that I felt like I was hit on the head or something and 

that was one I suddenly woke up. 

My eyes shot open and lifted head off the pillow. 

It sort of felt like a scary dream but it really wasn't scary. 

I don't know it was such a strange dream especially the last scene. 

>~<

That is all I really remember. 

I know I had other dreams but I can't recall any. 

Oh well, it was a random dream I don't think it means anything. 

. . .

Hopefully

Wrapping up my Day

So, every sunday I usually go with my mum and see my sister for lunch. Today we went early so we can buy some things to use to wrap up the vietnamese roll things. It was really fun making them and really yummy to it. I wish I took so pictures of how horrible I wrapped my rolls up but I did take a big of somethings we used.

Also forgot to take a picture before we started eating >~<

It made like about 5 and it was so filling. I didn't expect that it would make me so full but it could be the result of my drinking a lot of coke as well. Haha~ Oh well. After, my sister and I walked my dog which was really tiring because she kept pulling me along and I wore the wrong shoes for walking.

I am pretty happy with myself since I had exercised quite a bit even though I don't need to I feel that getting more healthier is good anyway. I am gonna improve my stamina and try and gain some muscle. Yeah, one thing I am proud of today wonder if I can exercise everyday maybe make myself more tired. ^.^

Now I shall work hard until night before I can sleep lets go~ probably won't work non-stop but I will try and do as much as I can.

Down in the Dumps

I don't know why but I am not feel so happy today. In fact I feel really burden and nervous. It sort of feels like someone is squeezing at your heart and trying to pull it out through your throat (sort of gruesome). It doesn't hurt but it feels uncomfortable and making me feel nauseas. Maybe it is something physically wrong with me or maybe there is just to much going on around me making me feel uncomfortable.

I feel like I disappointed Ling or made him upset cause I didn't agree to go out or wasn't very convincing to my mum to let me out. Honestly, I didn't really wanna go out anyway I felt nervous and tense when I knew he wanted me to go out cause I didn't know how to say I don't wanna cause I worry in making him sad. I am glad I didn't go but I feel more nervous and tense cause I feel that I made him not happy. But then again my mind tells me right now to not think about that and think for myself for once and that sort of helps.

Another thing is that my mum even though she is trying not to pressure me in doing well she is subconsciously or consciously still pressuring me. Every time she comes around she tells me I need to do 3 hrs of maths a day at least. Or she comes in with food and be like here have this and work hard. Or in the morning she tells me you shouldn't sleep too much you must wake up early to study. She might not think she is adding more pressure on me but it is. In fact, I realised that I have been tired a lot more recently and maybe it is all this feelings making me really wanna escape reality.

I have another problem and one many of my friends wouldn't be very happy about. I think. . . I think I have been eating less recently or maybe it is starting from today. I don't know but I am not as hungry as I usually am at this time. I don't know why but usually when I am not feeling happy, I tend not to eat as much. I looking through the mirror and just see how skinny I am. I honestly a skeleton, no flesh whatsoever. It is just skin and bones. This is really not healthy for me.

I thought about exercising today and I know many would think are you crazy exercising when you are so thing. Well though I am thin, I am not healthy so maybe gaining so muscle would be good. I wanted to but then My mum who keeps telling go study more and so far. I just felt like staying in my room and not going out. That is basically what I did.

My dad then at dinner gave me a lecture on how if I can't concentrate I should come down and run for 10 mins and all that. I am not saying he is wrong and in fact I agree that I should but I don't wanna hear the lecture about it. I know already and today I am just not in the mood anymore. He also doesn't understand me. He thinks how mentally weak I am, he thinks that when I run I stop once I get tired. I know for one that I don't do that I have ran beyond that point especially when I am in the mood (cause I found a motivation to)

Ahhh~~~ I am just not in the right mind frame. I have mentally exhausted myself with all this negativity and I really wanna sleep again to escape life. But I can't I need to study and exercise and just not sleep until I can. . .

Gosh I don't know anymore. I really just. . . Whatever. I am gonna go listen to that song that makes me smile and continue on with some work I guess. . . =.=

[BANGTAN BOMB] 방탄도령단 - 危險 (Appeal ver.)

Best thing to watch right now ^.^ 

Distracts my mind keeps my panic attacks away.

Just makes me smile like crazy. 

BTS FIGHTING~ ^-^

Nervous/Panic Attacks

The feeling you get when you are nervous or panicked feels really uncomfortable. 

Sometimes I get really bad ones and sometimes not so bad. 

When I get really bad ones, I begin to start coughing and feel nausea. 

Usually hard to keep my head together and overcome it. 

When it is not so serious I just feel restless which has a lot. 

Today and I believe yesterday night, I was feeling a bit nervous.

More so today then yesterday. >~< Really don't like the feeling. 

I think I might just go hide in a dark corner for now and just do something. 

High School is Over

All that is left now it the HSC. Today is the official day that I stop all formal classes and I only have the graduation mass and dinner left. I still need to go for tutorial class next week other than that I am on my own.

In actually fact I thought I would be more emotionally than I was and maybe I would be on our graduation mass and dinner but today. I stood at the open courts with my friends waiting for the bell to ring for the last time, the sign of my high school life coming to an end and I felt nothing. I didn't feel excited nor sad that I was leaving. But I know I would miss my high school life in the future and miss being with my friends almost everyday. Think of that makes me feel a little emotional.

Oh well. I shall say farewell to my 6 years of my life inside this high school and I never thought I would stay in this high school for 6 years. I expected my mum to move me out of this school and enter a better one but she never did. I am glad of it though cause I could graduate with the people I really care about and I was able to spend longer time just chilling with them and learning with them.

I will be able to say my finally farewell on monday. I will miss all the memories spent there. Alright Everybody Good Luck for the rest of the road to University. We shall ace our HSC. WOOOO (I doubt I would for some reason).

High School Life is Nearly Over.

Tomorrow, is the last day. 

Last day of normal school day for me.

Last day walking in and out of the school at normal school hours. 

It is sort exciting yet sad.

It is also scary in some way cause you don't know which way to go.

I am still very indecisive of what career I really wanna pursue.

Part of me is looking at education, the other at engineering. 

To course that a complete different to each other. 

What am I going to do with life???

Will It Last?

The title to me sort of sounds like I would be talking more about Ling and I and couple stuff but this time it isn't. This time I feel like pouring out feelings I have about friendships and it feels like I haven't done that in awhile. In fact I don't think I have truly even thought about it as much as I have. I miss the past when I will go and talk to my friends about personal things and go into what each other things and all that. I miss doing that with a few of my closest friends but now we all seem to be caught up in our own world and problems.

In the future, that is going to be more so and I know it in my heart but I hate to admit it. If you think about it, would we really be able to maintain a friendship from high school into Uni and into our lives after. I know a few friends don't think it can happen and very few believe that you can make it last. I want to believe you can make it last but making it last doesn't involve one persons effort but the other party too.

I know I will definitely aim to keep in contact with a couple of my friends cause they are the most important and special people I have met in my lifetime. They are the people I wanna keep the friendship and make it last till the end of time. But part of me tells me I can only do it until at least the 2nd year of Uni. I am scared to lose so many good friends cause I feel like once I lose them I would never have friends like them again. I feel like I would be left alone in the world with no friends at all. Hmmm. . . I don't know, I was never good at making friends and I find it hard as well.

Another thing I feel like I want to mention is about something I heard from beautiful. I know I shouldn't judge and I feel like I shouldn't feel this way cause I should know better. But even so, I feel a little disheartened. I feel a little distant from my beloved onee-san. Maybe it is just not being able to talk to her for a long time or maybe I just feel she is changing a bit. I remember (hoping I didn't remember incorrectly) that she had said she adapts to the people around her. It is a good skill to have to adapt to the people around you and make new friends and all. But not everyone can belong everywhere there is always some place that makes are feel more comfortable and more like ourselves. To me I feel that maybe onee-san found a place that she has a better connection with or maybe now she is experienced more and has a different outlook on things. I don't know. I am confused really and unsure of what is happening with her and the world around her. I am saddened by the fact that I can't be able to be near her or be able to contact her as much as before. I know HSC is near and I don't have time for that but I am still saddened by it.

I will always love onee-san and I want to be the friend that allows herself to show her true self and let her be able to be herself. But if she is happier or feels that she can be her yourself with other people then I would be happy for her and support her. From what I know, onee-san has always been the one trying hard to keep a friendship she cherishes and will always aim to keep in contact. Sometimes it is hard and I understand that too.

I am sorry if whatever I say might not be right or I might just be thinking too much or whatever. But it feels like onee-san has gotten a lot close to her new friends and possible to the point that she won't need her old school friends. She has found so many new friends and people more experienced and able to give her more help than I ever could. I know what I say might be wrong but it was I feel, it even might just be me being jealous of that fact that her other friends are more close to her than I am. Yes I am jealous. I am jealous that her new friends can spend nearly every single day with her. I am jealous that they are able to graduate with her. I am sorry but I am just jealous.

Onee-san, I love you very much and care about you. No matter what choices you make and what person you be I would support you and be happy for you. Even if the path you choose is the opposite direction I might be going just remember I still support you. If it so happens that we go down different paths then I really do wish that you are happy. I am sorry if whatever I say is me having mistaken what I have heard and seen but it is just my current opinion and thoughts. From now until HSC there is probably now way of contacting you but I have to be honest with you, I feel that you have changed. Not sure how exactly but it feels that way.

Sigh. I really wonder how long can a friendship last? Is it to a point where a certain friendship would just crumple and fail? Is it really true that friends come and go but only family will last forever? If so, doesn't it mean I am stuck in a family filled with separation forever? The thought of that sort of hurts so I think I just end it there, too much for one night.

A Good Girlfriend!?

I was just thinking about somethings that had happened yesterday. I remember a few things cause some things I sort of blanked out or that I rather not reveal about. Anyway, I remember talking to Ling and spending time with him after tutoring. Some topics was a little bit serious and some things are not so.

We mention about relationship things and I remembered how he had promised to love me forever and all that kind of stuff. At the time, I thought that is good and all while parts of me doubted that it was the truth. I was right to doubt it really though what happens in the future we will never know. You know he told me he will be with me for 3 years and basically almost 1 and a half has already gone. Honestly, what kind of person really decided when to end a relationship but I really can't tell if it was the truth or not.

I know it is stupid to take high school relationship serious and I guess I am prepared for what is to come. But for me I like to take things seriously cause everything we do is creating a small path of our future and I honestly don't wanna just play around. Though I know most guys around this age and probably older would all rather play around but that is life.

I guess I shouldn't really care about that cause really I had already knew that high school relationships had a low chance of lasting forever. So one thing I am not so bother about now. Another thing I remember hearing was that I was a good girlfriend though I think he told me that he said his sister had I said I was a good girlfriend but maybe not the one Ling was looking for. He told me he would have to see maybe I wasn't but the fact that I his sister thinks I am a good girlfriend makes me happy.

I actually told him that my friends think I should be angry more at him due to what his friends had said about me and that I don't get angry enough. He ask why would should I get angry at him for something his friends said and that he had to deal with the bad things his friends say about me. I was pretty honest with him I told him that it would effect me more cause I have to live with it. But eventually he had told me that he isn't the kind of person to be effected by what his friends say about me which is a good thing to hear.

>.< I can't remember anything else anymore. I am pretty tired and a lot of things that had happened seem to have blurred out. Oh well. I guess I shouldn't worry too much on this relationship cause whatever happens happens and the important things is to be true to yourself and be happy.

Ms Leong

I am SO gonna miss my Bio teacher. 

She is so nice and thoughtful. 

Yesterday for our last lesson together,

she gave us chocolates and a key chain. 

4 years, I have had her as a science teacher. 

I will truly miss being in her class. 

I will try hard to get the best result for Bio as I can. 

I shall miss our classes together, Ms. 

So self - absorbed

Honestly, my dad is so EXTREMELY SELF-CENTRED.

I mean everything evolves around him and he believes that.

Like all that my mum should do is think and care about him. 

To him, I am not that important which is the opposite of what parents should think.

I am not saying that I am more important in fact I think my mum is more important. 

Same old arguments. 

Even to the point of divorce not that I really care. 

Not to make things worst I rather they did. That way I can live a happy life with my sister and my mum.  

Or by myself, I gonna be old enough to live on my own.

Really just gotta get out of this loud messed up home. 

One day, one day I would be able to escape.

Can't wait =.=

Interview: BTS - Bangtan Boys (South Korea) discuss KCON, meeting Warren...

OMG~~~ I REALLY HOPE BTS WILL COME TO AUSTRALIA AFTER MY HSC EXAMS. I WILL SO BUY CONCERT TICKETS TO GO SEE THEM AND IT WOULD ALSO BE THE FIRST TIME I HAVE BEEN TO A CONCERT. AHHH SO EXCITED. I AM ANTICIPATING FOR THEM TO COME >v<